Do You Need To Keep Busy, Or Can You Relax And Do Nothng?

Timenspace said:
My body taught me the necessity to relax , even for a while.
There were a few mad years of two jobs, house, family, until I fell over at a street rushing from work to make it to the butcher's shop. That was the first wake up call.
Then some more madness, I fell from the doorstairs, broke my foot. That was a stronger call.
Then finally, through some gradual changes in easing the work schedule,job change, and a strained ischiaticus I realized, I do need relaxing periods, and "me-time".

So what I do now is, mostly, do then relax for a while, then do again, relax etc.
Sort of lasagna layer aaproach😂

Relax is rarely completely without either music, news, videos or planning, at least the body rests.

But at extreme times, I will shut off any stimuli and just ride the train or walk the streets to sort of silence the brain fireworks...😂

For anxiety I use the box technique breathing.

I should go back to meditating though, as we did in yoga. It is a deeper mindfullness that does good.
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I can't meditate to save my life. My brain isn't capable of shutting up -- well, almost. For me, the ultimate mind-cleaner was taking my SeaDoo to the lake on a weekday afternoon. On the weekends, the lake was crowded, but on a Wednesday afternoon, I practically had the whole lake to myself. Me and 110 HP of Rotax would go full throttle the whole length of the lake -- about 60MPH on smooth water. That is the most "in the moment" I believe I have ever been.

CD
 
caseydog said:
I can't meditate to save my life. My brain isn't capable of shutting up -- well, almost. For me, the ultimate mind-cleaner was taking my SeaDoo to the lake on a weekday afternoon. On the weekends, the lake was crowded, but on a Wednesday afternoon, I practically had the whole lake to myself. Me and 110 HP of Rotax would go full throttle the whole length of the lake -- about 60MPH on smooth water. That is the most "in the moment" I believe I have ever been.

CD
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Wow that is cool. Whatever works for you is fine.
I believe the underlying principle to be the same, occupy the mind with "in the moment" activity and let the worries decrease , or our attention to the worries.
Then, later, you can worry again😂 but you gave the brain a break and recharged.
That is what I sometimes feel while jogging, focus on stride, breathing, head position, relaxing torso, feeling the leg muscles, looking at the sky, listening to the hip hop in my earphones...and leaving all else behind...

For the time...

I truthfully found it easier to meditate at the yoga studio, than at home. Haven't been to the studio in ages...
 
Timenspace said:
Wow that is cool. Whatever works for you is fine.
I believe the underlying principle to be the same, occupy the mind with "in the moment" activity and let the worries decrease , or our attention to the worries.
Then, later, you can worry again😂 but you gave the brain a break and recharged.
That is what I sometimes feel while jogging, focus on stride, breathing, head position, relaxing torso, feeling the leg muscles, looking at the sky, listening to the hip hop in my earphones...and leaving all else behind...

For the time...

I truthfully found it easier to meditate at the yoga studio, than at home. Haven't been to the studio in ages...
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Going fast has a way of focusing a person "in the moment." I've noticed the same thing blasting down a mountain on skis as I did on the SeaDoo -- and driving a car fast on a track. In fact, it is not uncommon for professional race car drivers to come in for a pit stop with their eyes dried out and burning, because they've be so focused on driving fast that they literally forget to blink their eyelids.

CD
 
caseydog said:
Going fast has a way of focusing a person "in the moment." I've noticed the same thing blasting down a mountain on skis as I did on the SeaDoo -- and driving a car fast on a track. In fact, it is not uncommon for professional race car drivers to come in for a pit stop with their eyes dried out and burning, because they've be so focused on driving fast that they literally forget to blink their eyelids.

CD
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You blast down in skis? Wow. Ski is a never go for me. I love walking on mountains, but not skiing. Did try. It was hurtful😂. A skier jammed into my back, had a main-dish-plate sized bruise for weeks...and am scared of heights, so I pass.
Yeah, I can understand that. It requires a deep focus.
Isn't it a reflex to blink?
I was fascinated by the pit stops and tyre changes, so organized, so swift, 👍
 
Even confined to the wheelchair or sofa for the last 4 ½ months, I have not been able to do nothing. I never have been able to. Sitting watching TV, my hands have to be busy. I'm always knitting. Yeah. I know you didn't see that one coming. To date this year I haven't knitted much to be honest. I've completed 14 pairs of socks, 1 jumper (which was a test knit, so errors in the pattern, and other issues needed addressing) & 1 cardigan. The cardigan took the longest because of the border. One of the rows in the 4 row repeat took 2 hours to do with almost 500 stitches on that single row. They were labour intensive stitches. luckily the other 3 rows in that 4 row repeating pattern only took 1 1/2 hours between them but the entire border needed 10 repeats.

I used to carve wooden spoons in the sitting room and occasionally bowls, but hubby was never happy having a groundsheet down for extended periods of time so I stopped carving.

I often ended up fixing computers whilst watching TV. I'd have so many needing rebuilding that I'd often have 2 or 3 going at once.
 
LissaC said:
Agree. I have no idea what it's like to have an empty head.
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It's a common misperception that meditation requires emptying one's head. Not many people can achieve that, but many achieve a certain distance from their thoughts. I have meditated for 20 years, almost every day without fail and I can assert that most of the time I have thoughts while meditating. The difference is that I don't dwell upon my thoughts when meditating, when one comes I don't focus on it. A lot of Buddhist meditation teachers will teach you to 'observe' your thoughts, because being without thought is not a common occurence for our brains.
I have had it happen sometimes in deep meditation states, but that's not the kind of state I am in every day even after 20 years of frequent practice.
 
Windigo said:
It's a common misperception that meditation requires emptying one's head. Not many people can achieve that, but many achieve a certain distance from their thoughts. I have meditated for 20 years, almost every day without fail and I can assert that most of the time I have thoughts while meditating. The difference is that I don't dwell upon my thoughts when meditating, when one comes I don't focus on it. A lot of Buddhist meditation teachers will teach you to 'observe' your thoughts, because being without thought is not a common occurence for our brains.
I have had it happen sometimes in deep meditation states, but that's not the kind of state I am in every day even after 20 years of frequent practice.
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Very true. And awareness is present. Of the air, scents, hearbeat, breathing, floor , your body...and many thoughts but not getting preoccupied or stressed with them...like leaves on a stream floating by...
 
I love to do nothing, relax, I read a lot. That said, I also like, and if I'm being honest, need to have a feeling of accomplishment at the end of the day. I think most people who have days, multiple days or even weeks with out a feeling of accomplishment will fall in to depression.
 
I relax more these days as I grow older, sort of from a necessity. In younger days, I was always busy and an adrenaline thrill seeker. I still like to keep busy and I believe that as people get into their latter years, if they have little to do, they will succumb to feelings of futility and uselessness, that depression which topazann speaks, but in the opposite direction.

There needs to be a healthy medium of activity and relaxation in life, especially, in old age when the enthusiasm of work and career disappear. Hobbies, especially, suddenly become very important and friends and neighbors become more important than they ever were.
 
Two weeks ago we were lucky to be in Corfu, a lovely quiet hotel. In the morning we would have a light leisurely breakfast then go back to our accommodation, and laze around on the day bed next to our private pool and just lay there, after the s**t show of the past couple of years (covid and personal) we needed the opportunity to do absolutely nothing, it took me a couple of days to accept that I didn't have to plan anything, didn't have to do anything, we can just do nothing and it is OK, clear the mind, cleanse the soul.
 
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