The General Chat Thread (2016-2022)

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mjd said:
However, those conditions are not mutually exclusive; but, I get your point.
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Yep of course they are not mutually exclusive :okay:
I have always found any kind of labelling particularly irritating, be it of gender or of origin.
I say this because I experienced both and I did not always have the right weapons to defend myself.
 
JAS_OH1 said:
I had a job for a number of years (pre-COVID-19) where I completed business evaluations of varying sorts. Sometimes my husband was allowed to accompany me but most the time I flew solo. The times where it was a two-person assessment, I had on more than one occasion a salesman talk right over my head to my husband as if I wasn't even there, even though I was the one who was in charge of the decision making (i.e. - car sales, in-home window installation, etc.). My husband would seem disinterested and deflect them, saying something like, "Don't ask me, ask her," which really seemed to confuse them, LOL!

In this day and age, SMH.
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Years ago I quit a stable job to take a job within the outdoors media industry that was based largely on commission. Young and "dumb", I believed all that was promised to me when only two weeks after starting the job I get called to a meeting where there is some "guy" who is now going to accompany me on my outings and "share" in my commissions.

When I raised my concerns that "sharing" was never part of my deal, the "guy" literally patted me on my leg and told me to settle down get him a cup of coffee. Initially in my mind I was like " hell to the NO" but then I thought for a minute, got up went and got his coffee came back and as I got close enough to hand it to him, I acted like I tripped and dumped the cup of coffee straight onto his lap. One of the co-owners of the company freaked out, the " guy" was busy muttering and trying to dry his khakis off and I simply turned and walked out laughing the whole way.

The next day, another co-owner called me all upset over what had transpired with "sharing my commission" and tried to woo me back. No thanks! I was lucky enough to have fall back opportunities and went on with my life. The business folded within 18 months so I am glad I didn't devote any more time to it. I have more than one tale like that, of course this was 30+ years ago.
 
Yorky said:
I've taught five women to drive. Three wives, one girlfriend and my daughter. Three Thais and two Brits. I taught them to always start in first and never miss a gear. And that's how they've continued to drive (at least when I've been there).
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They haven't driven stick with a broken toe, I'd guess.

BTW, The Toyota Hilux heavy duty models had "granny gears" for first gear, IIRC. Only useful for heavy loads or towing a trailer.

CD
 
We may choose to take on gender stereotypes, or not. Personally, I can cook, I can iron creases in things like you wouldn't believe (not in jeans, obviously, that would be stupid). I can polish up most things so you can see your face in them. I don't have much patience with people of any gender who declare an inability to do pretty basic stuff, male or female oriented.
 
Well, it appears that Trump is at it again. He's coming to Texas today (oh, joy) to give a speech... at the Alamo. If you know the history behind the Alamo, you'll know why this is troubling.

Texas forces lost a bloody battle to the Mexican Army in the war for Texas. The slogan, "Remember the Alamo" became a battle cry for Texas forces until they finally beat the Mexican Army, and Texas became a Republic, later to become a US State.

The symbolism of Trump giving a speech at the Alamo is heavy, and can't be coincidental.

For more history on the battle of the Alamo, look here: Battle of the Alamo - Wikipedia

CD
 
caseydog said:
Well, it appears that Trump is at it again. He's coming to Texas today (oh, joy) to give a speech... at the Alamo. If you know the history behind the Alamo, you'll know why this is troubling.

Texas forces lost a bloody battle to the Mexican Army in the war for Texas. The slogan, "Remember the Alamo" became a battle cry for Texas forces until they finally beat the Mexican Army, and Texas became a Republic, later to become a US State.

The symbolism of Trump giving a speech at the Alamo is heavy, and can't be coincidental.

For more history on the battle of the Alamo, look here: Battle of the Alamo - Wikipedia

CD
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Why does he feel the need to give a speech? He is history.
 
epicuric said:
Why does he feel the need to give a speech? He is history.
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Click the link. It is where he is giving it that matters. It is symbolic of losing a battle, and going forward to win the war. We all were taught the history of the Alamo as school kids in the US, but outside the US, it probably doesn't mean much.

Depending on what he says, it could fire up his "cult following." It would certainly fire up the most extreme elements, like the ones who stormed the Capitol.

CD
 
caseydog said:
They haven't driven stick with a broken toe, I'd guess.

BTW, The Toyota Hilux heavy duty models had "granny gears" for first gear, IIRC. Only useful for heavy loads or towing a trailer.

CD
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Here, we call that first gear "bulldog." I can still hear my dad yelling at me after stalling the farm truck, "Put it in bulldog, you idiot!" :laugh:
 
LissaC said:
Stereotyped gender roles are still an issue. A lot of people assume women will take of the house, do the cooking, etc, and men will look after cars, home repairs, etc. I remember many years ago, I was at work, calling my now ex-boyfriend and giving him instructions on how to turn on the washing machine. A colleague who was only 2/3 years older than me seemed genuinely surprised "Oh, you ask him to turn on the washing machine?" Yes I do. And I asked him to dust and vaccum too. Her partner couldn't do any household chores. And she once had to leave work to take their daughter to the hospital because the girl had a fever and the partner was helpless. Once again a lot of women reinforce this kind of behavior - they don't let men do anything because they don't clean properly, they store the dishes wrong, they can't soothe the baby, etc, they will find faults in anything the man ever does. Following the same line of reason women shouldn't expect men to fix everything the house and they should learn the basics themselves. But you still need to eat and clean more often than you need to fix the sink or paint a wall, though, so the chores better be shared between the two.
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This is so true. I've been very lucky with my male partners. They did as much housework as I did and looked after the kids as much. In fact my current partner stayed home to look after the kids (when they were little) whilst I went to work. It made sense. I earned four times more than he did. He did all the cooking and most of the cleaning as I worked long hours.

I was a feminist back in the 60's (still am) and well aware of the inequalities between genders. I'm really quite shocked by the fact that the stereotypical roles still hold true some 40 years later. We are talking about Western culture here. In many cultures, these stereotypes have never changed and women face unspeakable penalties if they challenge them. Its so upsetting and sad.
 
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Yorky said:
I've taught five women to drive. Three wives, one girlfriend and my daughter. Three Thais and two Brits. I taught them to always start in first and never miss a gear. And that's how they've continued to drive (at least when I've been there).
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I've driven over 3 million ks in my life time, guess I just got lazy,lol. I wore out about 4 hi luxes.

Russ
 
epicuric said:
In fairness, it's not a sexism issue. I have worked with companies like this, they will not send out a salesperson unless both decision makers will be present, otherwise it is unlikely they will close the sale. Sales pitches are designed get the deal signed on the first visit, not having to make repeated follow up calls after partners are being consulted, or competitive quotes are obtained. Also, how many men would feel comfortable choosing new carpets without their wife being present?
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Don't go there, we are still arguing about our carpet, wife decided and we are still not 100% settled.

Russ
 
Yorky said:
Back in '85 when we were buying our house on The Wirral the then owner offered to sell us the fitted carpets for a few hundred quid extra. Both my wife and I agreed that the colours were terrible and we would probably have to pay to get rid of them so we said "no". The sellers took them up in a huff and took them away (they also took the light bulbs - cheeky buggers!).

My wife went out looking for new carpets (I was working at the time) and came up with a plain (I thought it was plain) light brown colour that she proposed for the lounge/dining room, entrance hall, stairs and upstairs landing. I rarely argued with my wife on such matters therefore the order was placed and within a few days the carpet fitters arrived. I cannot remember how long the fitting process took (no longer than a couple of days) but when it was complete, my wife rang me to tell me that the pattern was not straight (pattern?). She rang them and the supervisor came round and offered her a hundred quid as compensation. When I arrived home and heard this, even I could see the carpet wasn't laid straight (not rearly but if there's money involved....).

I rang them the next day and told the supervisor that my wife wanted the carpet replaced. He sounded almost in tears. I explained that there was no placating her; she was adamant that it had to be replaced. He upped the compensation to 200 quid but by him doing that I knew I had him on the ropes.

Eventually, a settlement of 600 quid was agreed.

I never really could see that the carpet wasn't laid square but if you pulled up a piece from the gripper, the weaving on the underside was definitely off kilter.
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Our argument was my wife doesn't know the difference between cut pile and loop pile, or wool vs nylon. And to go deeper. Warp and weft weave. I know all sorts of strange sh&t, she doesn't.

Russ
 
LissaC said:
Stereotyped gender roles are still an issue. A lot of people assume women will take of the house, do the cooking, etc, and men will look after cars, home repairs, etc. I remember many years ago, I was at work, calling my now ex-boyfriend and giving him instructions on how to turn on the washing machine. A colleague who was only 2/3 years older than me seemed genuinely surprised "Oh, you ask him to turn on the washing machine?" Yes I do. And I asked him to dust and vaccum too. Her partner couldn't do any household chores. And she once had to leave work to take their daughter to the hospital because the girl had a fever and the partner was helpless. Once again a lot of women reinforce this kind of behavior - they don't let men do anything because they don't clean properly, they store the dishes wrong, they can't soothe the baby, etc, they will find faults in anything the man ever does. Following the same line of reason women shouldn't expect men to fix everything the house and they should learn the basics themselves. But you still need to eat and clean more often than you need to fix the sink or paint a wall, though, so the chores better be shared between the two.
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Not in our house, when my now wife and I moved into a flat in 75 I took a second job, commercial cleaning. That involved cleaning toilets and sinks etc. I've always helped out. I still do washing etc here.

Russ
 
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