You would probably be hung, drawn and quartered if you ever made a toasted bread cucumber sandwich. If they commuted your sentence, then you'd be locked in a dungeon and made to listen to the PM for 24 hours a day.I'd have to toast mine or it's homemade.
British tea sandwiches are as sacred as the Turin shroud. White bread, butter, English cucumber (sliced thinly) a little salt, a touch of white pepper. Absolutely no toast.