What made you smile recently (2025)?

An old (really old) Dave Allen joke:
A nun was walking down the passageway when another nun remarked:
"Wow! You got out of bed the wrong side this morning!"
The first nun was a bit puzzled, carried on, then met another nun:
" Ooooh! you got out of bed the wrong side this morning!"
The nun carried on and the same thing happened about 15 times, until she was steaming livid.
She met the mother superior and immediately shouted:
" DON'T EVEN DREAM OF TELLING ME I GOT OUT OF BED THE WRONG SIDE THIS MORNING!!!!"
Mother superior said:
No, I wasn't going to say that. I was just going to tell you that you're wearing the bishop's shoes".
 
1000027495.jpg
1000027391.jpg
1000027381.jpg
 
They Walk Among Us!

I was at the checkout at Walmart, minding my own business, when the cashier rang up my total: $46.64. I handed her a crisp $50 bill. She looked me dead in the eye, gave me back $46.64, and continued scanning items like a professional.
Me: "Uh… I think there's a mistake."
Her: huffing dramatically "Sir, I am educated. I know what I'm doing."
She pushed the money back at me like I was trying to scam her.
So, I did what any reasonable person would do—I gave it back.
She, once again, pushed it right back at me with extra attitude.
I shrugged, picked up my bags, and walked out with $46.64 in my pocket. 🤷‍♂️
They Walk Among Us…

I walked into Starbucks with a "Buy-One-Get-One-Free" coupon for a Grande Latte. The barista studied it like it was the Declaration of Independence, then turned to a chalkboard that read "Buy One, Get One Free."
Her eyes lit up. "Oh! So that means… they're both free!"
She happily handed me two free lattes.
I didn't argue. I just walked out, sipping my victory. ☕☕
They Walk Among Us…

One day, I was strolling along the beach with some friends when one of them gasped dramatically, pointed ahead, and yelled:
"Look! A dead bird!"
Another friend immediately looked up at the sky and asked, "Where?"
I just… I had no words. 🫠
They Walk Among Us…

My brother was house hunting and asked the real estate agent which direction was north. He explained that he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning.
The agent furrowed her brow. "Wait… does the sun rise in the north?"
My brother, thinking she was joking, laughed.
She was not joking.
He gently explained that the sun rises in the east… and, you know, has been doing that for quite a while now.
She shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with all that stuff."
I... I had to walk away.
They Walk Among Us…

Back when I worked in a 24/7 call center, a guy called and asked:
"What hours are you open?"
Me: "Sir, we're open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week."
Him: "Okay, but is that Eastern or Pacific time?"
I stared at my screen for a solid 10 seconds before replying:
"Uh… Pacific."
He thanked me and hung up, probably feeling proud of himself.
They Walk Among Us…

My sister has one of those emergency seatbelt cutters in her car—designed to save her life if she ever gets trapped.
She keeps it in the trunk.
🤦‍♂️
They Walk Among Us…

My friends and I went to buy beer for a party. The store had a 10% discount on cases. Since we were professionals, we grabbed two cases.
The cashier did some quick mental math.
"Oh, two cases? That's 10% + 10%… so you get 20% off!"
We all nodded and quietly accepted our new financial advisor.
They Walk Among Us…

At the airport, I couldn't find my luggage, so I went to the lost baggage counter.
Me: "My bags never showed up."
The lady smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry, sir! I'm a trained professional. Now… has your plane landed yet?"
I blinked.
Me: "Nope, we're still circling the airport. The pilot told us we're third in line to land."
Her: "Oh! Okay, well, come back after you land."
…Sure thing, genius.
They Walk Among Us…

While working at a pizza place, I watched a man order a small pizza to-go.
Cook: "Would you like that cut into four or six slices?"
The man thought long and hard before replying:
"Better make it four. I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat six."
Bless their hearts. 🤣😂🤣
They Walk Among Us…
 
Barriehie said:
They Walk Among Us!

I was at the checkout at Walmart, minding my own business, when the cashier rang up my total: $46.64. I handed her a crisp $50 bill. She looked me dead in the eye, gave me back $46.64, and continued scanning items like a professional.
Me: "Uh… I think there's a mistake."
Her: huffing dramatically "Sir, I am educated. I know what I'm doing."
She pushed the money back at me like I was trying to scam her.
So, I did what any reasonable person would do—I gave it back.
She, once again, pushed it right back at me with extra attitude.
I shrugged, picked up my bags, and walked out with $46.64 in my pocket. 🤷‍♂️
They Walk Among Us…

I walked into Starbucks with a "Buy-One-Get-One-Free" coupon for a Grande Latte. The barista studied it like it was the Declaration of Independence, then turned to a chalkboard that read "Buy One, Get One Free."
Her eyes lit up. "Oh! So that means… they're both free!"
She happily handed me two free lattes.
I didn't argue. I just walked out, sipping my victory. ☕☕
They Walk Among Us…

One day, I was strolling along the beach with some friends when one of them gasped dramatically, pointed ahead, and yelled:
"Look! A dead bird!"
Another friend immediately looked up at the sky and asked, "Where?"
I just… I had no words. 🫠
They Walk Among Us…

My brother was house hunting and asked the real estate agent which direction was north. He explained that he didn't want the sun waking him up every morning.
The agent furrowed her brow. "Wait… does the sun rise in the north?"
My brother, thinking she was joking, laughed.
She was not joking.
He gently explained that the sun rises in the east… and, you know, has been doing that for quite a while now.
She shook her head and said, "Oh, I don't keep up with all that stuff."
I... I had to walk away.
They Walk Among Us…

Back when I worked in a 24/7 call center, a guy called and asked:
"What hours are you open?"
Me: "Sir, we're open 24 hours a day, 7 days a week."
Him: "Okay, but is that Eastern or Pacific time?"
I stared at my screen for a solid 10 seconds before replying:
"Uh… Pacific."
He thanked me and hung up, probably feeling proud of himself.
They Walk Among Us…

My sister has one of those emergency seatbelt cutters in her car—designed to save her life if she ever gets trapped.
She keeps it in the trunk.
🤦‍♂️
They Walk Among Us…

My friends and I went to buy beer for a party. The store had a 10% discount on cases. Since we were professionals, we grabbed two cases.
The cashier did some quick mental math.
"Oh, two cases? That's 10% + 10%… so you get 20% off!"
We all nodded and quietly accepted our new financial advisor.
They Walk Among Us…

At the airport, I couldn't find my luggage, so I went to the lost baggage counter.
Me: "My bags never showed up."
The lady smiled reassuringly. "Don't worry, sir! I'm a trained professional. Now… has your plane landed yet?"
I blinked.
Me: "Nope, we're still circling the airport. The pilot told us we're third in line to land."
Her: "Oh! Okay, well, come back after you land."
…Sure thing, genius.
They Walk Among Us…

While working at a pizza place, I watched a man order a small pizza to-go.
Cook: "Would you like that cut into four or six slices?"
The man thought long and hard before replying:
"Better make it four. I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat six."
Bless their hearts. 🤣😂🤣
They Walk Among Us…
Click to expand...


The worrying thing is that I've genuinely encountered similar situations.

Back when Windows 95 was the operating system of choice, I took a help desk call where I needed to remote control the computer in question. All computers had an identifying number on them and additionally the C drive label was the machine id. The user in question couldn't find the sticker so I innocently asked him to "double click on the my computer icon on the desktop). I heard a russle of papers over the phone before the response that I was "going to need to wait until he had cleared his desktop off paperwork"! He genuinely thought I meant that there was an icon of the top of his desk under the papers on his desk, that he needed to double click on! :o_o:

At the same company I also took another call where the user asked me if CDs were reusable. Knowing that the user had no need to burn CDs as part of their job, I asked them to explain what they meant. Her car had a CD player that played music to her and when it was finished it apart the cd out. But her work computer didn't play the CDs or spit them back out at her. Still utterly perplexed by her call, I ended up visiting her because I knew that she didn't have a CDs player in the work computer (the days before they came as standard). Her computer had what are known as blanking plates in the 2 slots at the front where a CD player could go. It turned out that she'd been feeding CDs into the gap between the 2 slots. She not just tried one or two CDs though. There was a stack of them inside her machine loose. After the first didn't work, she'd tried again, and again, and again, and again, again, again until there were no less than 25 CDs in there. At this point she'd run out, so rang for help! She didn't have a CD player in her machine btw. :o_o:
 
SatNavSaysStraightOn said:
The worrying thing is that I've genuinely encountered similar situations.

Back when Windows 95 was the operating system of choice, I took a help desk call where I needed to remote control the computer in question. All computers had an identifying number on them and additionally the C drive label was the machine id. The user in question couldn't find the sticker so I innocently asked him to "double click on the my computer icon on the desktop). I heard a russle of papers over the phone before the response that I was "going to need to wait until he had cleared his desktop off paperwork"! He genuinely thought I meant that there was an icon of the top of his desk under the papers on his desk, that he needed to double click on! :o_o:

At the same company I also took another call where the user asked me if CDs were reusable. Knowing that the user had no need to burn CDs as part of their job, I asked them to explain what they meant. Her car had a CD player that played music to her and when it was finished it apart the cd out. But her work computer didn't play the CDs or spit them back out at her. Still utterly perplexed by her call, I ended up visiting her because I knew that she didn't have a CDs player in the work computer (the days before they came as standard). Her computer had what are known as blanking plates in the 2 slots at the front where a CD player could go. It turned out that she'd been feeding CDs into the gap between the 2 slots. She not just tried one or two CDs though. There was a stack of them inside her machine loose. After the first didn't work, she'd tried again, and again, and again, and again, again, again until there were no less than 25 CDs in there. At this point she'd run out, so rang for help! She didn't have a CD player in her machine btw. :o_o:
Click to expand...
Help us!
 
Barriehie said:
Help us!
Click to expand...
there is always the software developer who deleted the winnt folder on a dual boot machine and restarted to see what would happen (all 3 of the events were at the same company). Oddly enough the machine didn't boot into Windows NT afterwards.

The conversation went along the lines of
him: i deleted the windows folder and restarted to see what would happen
Me: and?
him: it doesn't work
me: this surprises you?
him: yes. I need it to work now.
me: not happening. I'll log the call for you and get back to you
him: i want to speak to the helpdesk manager
me: you are speaking to the helpdesk manager
him: i demand to speak to your boss
me: fine, I'll get him to call you.

I went over to my boss and explained what had taken place.
my boss rang the guy and put it on loudspeaker - there was quite an audience at this point
he then made him go through each step, step by step until we got to the ringing the helpdesk bit, before call the guy names I won't repeat here. deleted the call off the system and rang the guy's boss

They then hatched a plot to make the guy rebuild his own machine, finding floppy disks (no less!) rather than CD-roms for the guy to rebuild his machine by hand (there was actually an image). He was made to completely rebuild and start again from scratch, installing both operating systems from floppy disk and then installing all of the programs TWICE, one for each operating system and so on. It took him the rest of the week to get his machine working again. Oddly enough I never heard from him again!
 
SatNavSaysStraightOn said:
there is always the software developer who deleted the winnt folder on a dual boot machine and restarted to see what would happen (all 3 of the events were at the same company). Oddly enough the machine didn't boot into Windows NT afterwards.

The conversation went along the lines of
him: i deleted the windows folder and restarted to see what would happen
Me: and?
him: it doesn't work
me: this surprises you?
him: yes. I need it to work now.
me: not happening. I'll log the call for you and get back to you
him: i want to speak to the helpdesk manager
me: you are speaking to the helpdesk manager
him: i demand to speak to your boss
me: fine, I'll get him to call you.

I went over to my boss and explained what had taken place.
my boss rang the guy and put it on loudspeaker - there was quite an audience at this point
he then made him go through each step, step by step until we got to the ringing the helpdesk bit, before call the guy names I won't repeat here. deleted the call off the system and rang the guy's boss

They then hatched a plot to make the guy rebuild his own machine, finding floppy disks (no less!) rather than CD-roms for the guy to rebuild his machine by hand (there was actually an image). He was made to completely rebuild and start again from scratch, installing both operating systems from floppy disk and then installing all of the programs TWICE, one for each operating system and so on. It took him the rest of the week to get his machine working again. Oddly enough I never heard from him again!
Click to expand...
Linux wins again!
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top Bottom